The Transforming Quaker Welcoming poster offers examples of conversation starters that can either alienate or welcome newcomers.  It can be a fruitful prompt for a discussion in your meeting about assumptions. 

Facilitation Tips: 

Print out a few copies of the poster 

Allow time for people to read through the examples listed on the poster.

Questions for discussion:

• Can anyone here relate to being the newcomer in any of these categories in the handout? 
• What was it like to be put in a box by the Friend or person meeting you? 
• What questions did they ask/assumptions did they make? 
• What questions would have been more inviting/welcoming?
• How do you like to be approached in spaces where you are a newcomer?
• What is the difference between curiosity and seeking connection?

Small Group Brainstorming

Point out that well-intentioned questions that make assumptions about a person based on surface level observations can shut down a conversation. Instead, how can we find ways to invite visitors to share in ways that are comfortable to them? What kinds of conversation starters can we use to build connection without making assumptions? 

Break into pairs or small groups and ask each group to brainstorm 3 examples of conversation starters and 3 examples of questions that are more likely to shut conversation down.

If answers are not forthcoming, offer some examples: What brings you here? How was worship for you this morning? I don’t believe we’ve met, my name is …  Share with the larger group.