 |  Sponsored by the FGC Religious Education Committee In this issue:
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Greetings, Friends: Suzanne Siverling and Michael Gibson, co-editors "As a deer longs for flowing streams...": Retreats for Adults: Shirley Dodson Planning and Facilitating Retreats for Children: Kevin Lee The Quake that Rocked the Midwest: Greg Woods Navigating the Multigenerational Retreat: Christie Duncan-Tessmer
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| Greetings,
Friends.
Suzanne Siverling and Michael Gibson, co-editors “As
a deer longs for flowing streams . . .” Prelude: Fullness of Life “I have long loved spaces that are quiet and apart . . .” So begins Fran Taber’s Pendle Hill pamphlet on personal retreats, Come Aside and Rest Awhile (see note 1, bottom of article). I sank into the living room sofa and relaxed into the cushions as Fran described her awareness of how important it is to have time for “retirement,” away from the stimulation of everyday life. But before I finished the first page,my ten-year-old daughter called me from the kitchen, needing help with her project on Olympic figure skating champion, Sarah Hughes.After finding our hole punch and helping Katie create holes for a shoelace in her posterboard skate, I returned to Fran’s words concerning the “deep hunger in religious circles ecumenically for a deeper experience of silence and solitude.” Before I could turn the page, Katie needed my help again. Over the course of an hour and a half,my reading of Fran’s pamphlet was interposed many times with the “stimulation of everyday life” as I leapt up to find a long-enough shoelace, shake a silver pen that wasn’t working and recommend alternatives, find a permanent marker, and give Katie heartfelt praise for a job well done. By the time the evening was over, I had read only ten pages. Life is good, in its fullness. Life with family, friends and work is rich and rewarding.Yet I, too, love “spaces that are quiet and apart,” and times for stillness, reflection and prayer. Is your life and longing similar? In this brief article, I want to explore several questions:Why do people need retreats? What are some elements that are often part of a good retreat? What are the positive outcomes that people experience from a good retreat? But first, there’s an even more basic question:What is a retreat? And finally, given the busyness of our daily lives, how can we find the time for “retirement” that will really refresh us? What is a retreat? Within Quakerism,‘retreat’ is used to refer to a broad spectrum of planned opportunities. A Friends meeting may have a day-long “retreat” at the meetinghouse to focus on a theme such as “deepening our spiritual lives,” and to strengthen the sense of community. Retreat centers have a variety of offerings, including the semi-silent, guided New Year’s retreat offered every year at Pendle Hill. Or an individual Friend may go off to a special location for a longer, private, silent retreat, with or without a spiritual director or guide. Some Friends have undertaken month-long retreats, often under the guidance of someone trained in this leadership in another religious tradition. Common to all of these possibilities is the opportunity to withdraw from one’s daily life for the good of oneself as a spiritual being. Nancy Bieber of Lancaster (PA) Meeting writes,“A retreat . . . may include content and learning but its emphasis is on stepping away from one’s life for renewal of spirit, engaging in a time of slowed down living for rest and refreshment, and creating space for spiritual listening” (See note 2, bottom of article). A different use of time is often part of the experience of retreat: a retreatant seeks to be present, here and now, rather than dwelling on the past or focusing on the future.A retreat is for being rather than for doing. Why do we need retreats? “In returning and rest you shall be saved; in quietness and in trust shall be your strength” (Isaiah 30:15, NRSV). Barbarajene Williams, who serves professionally as Spiritual Nurturer of staff at Pendle Hill, uses this quotation often in retreat leadership. In a recent conversation she noted three general reasons that we need retreats. First, she mentioned our need for discernment.When the rhythms of our lives seem to leave us in a rut,we need time and space to discern what we are to do. Second, she affirmed the human need for rest, for Sabbath time, for refreshment.Third (but not least), retreats are an answer to our need to deepen our life in the Spirit.“As a deer longs for flowing steams, so my soul longs for you, O God. My soul thirsts for God, for the living God.” (Psalm 42:1-2, NRSV). These three reasons are very close to those given by Nancy Bieber,who has led many retreats for Friends and other people of faith. She said recently,“We are human beings who are made to rest,” not just sleep at night.We need physical, spiritual and mental rest— time and space—the chance to take a break from our usual “goal directed” behavior.We need this rest repeatedly.We need time “just to be.” When we step back from our daily lives,we can see them from the outside and reflect on them.We get renewed in this space as we rest our “driving spirit” and listen to God.We “need to discern,” to “listen to God’s nudges” that can guide us in what we do. Jesus gave us a pattern of withdrawal, as for example in Matthew 14:23, when “. . . he went up to the mountain by himself to pray.” This withdrawal was followed by return to service again and again. What are some elements of a good retreat? Retreat leaders and participants frequently mention several factors.Time and space are key, including what Nancy Bieber calls “a sense of spaciousness.” This doesn’t have to mean a naturally beautiful setting (although that can help), but at least a “nurturing space.” It is useful to be in a setting different from one’s usual locations in order not to be distracted by what generally gets our attention. For overnight retreats it is good to have a room alone. It is also important to have a means of expressing outwardly what is going on inwardly.This could involve journaling; singing or other musical expression; art; dance, yoga, hiking or other movement, etc. Many retreatants find it helpful to have a companion: a spiritual director or guide, although some Friends have benefited from totally private retreats. In group retreats, the participants can nurture each other deeply. If focus is needed, a theme may help, such as,“What is God calling us to do?” Candles and spiritually centering music are important for some retreatants. Even more basic is our intention. Barbarajene Williams is clear that we “make” a retreat, which is different from “going on” or “taking” one.The retreatant is the co-creator of the retreat with God.We bring ourselves;we are present. What are the positive outcomes of a retreat? • “I am returning home with a renewed sense of God’s purpose and a peacefulness that was lacking in my life for some time.” • “It gave me new tools to get in touch with life.” • “This experience met my spiritual needs in ways I could not have imagined. Spirit most definitely was at work.” • “At this time in my life I just needed space, and I had that in generous amounts.” • “Mind-body-spirit refreshment. Thank you. Thanks be to God.” These expressions come from participants in a variety of guided group retreats at Pendle Hill. Retreatants go home feeling restored and rested. Sometimes there is no dramatic change; perhaps a sense of being more oneself. Sometimes, however, even a brief retreat can be the setting for empowering insight and even transformation.The “fruits of the Spirit” may find well expression, as in a greater active caring for another person. As Barbarajene Williams notes,we often emerge more aware of God’s presence, already active in our lives. How can we find time for “retirement?” As an introvert who has recognized my spiritual needs for a long time, I’ve sought quiet places for years. But as a wife and mother who works full-time, I can’t just take off by myself very often.What I’ve found is that God has often felt present for me in the middle of my busyness.Thomas Kelly, in A Testament of Devotion, describes how it is possible to live on two levels at once, active in our everyday concerns and at the same time receptive to “divine breathings” (see note 3, bottom of article). In my experience, intention is important here.What matters is to want the presence and guidance of the Spirit, in and through and impacting what is happening during the day. Yet longer times of “retirement” are invaluable.These include private times for prayer and reflection and meeting for worship.Then there are the many opportunities for longer retreats waiting for us when we are ready. If you feel tired, spiritually flagging or in need of discernment for your life, perhaps this is a call to “come aside and rest awhile,” to make time and space for yourself in a retreat. Note 1: Taber, Frances, Irene, Come Aside and Rest Awhile, Wallingford, PA: Pendle Hill Publications, 1997, p. 3. Note 2: Bieber, Nancy,“Reflections on Retreats at Pendle Hill,” unpublished piece,November 4, 2002, p. 1. Note 3 : Kelly, Thomas, A Testament of Devotion, New York: Harper, 1941, p. 35.
Planning and Facilitating Retreats for Children 
In 1989 we began a new retreat program called Junior Yearly Meeting Elementary Retreats under the care of New England Yearly Meeting (NEYM) for children in grades two through six.We provide five retreats during the school year held at larger meetings around New England, and two retreats, spring and fall, at Woolman Hill Retreat and Conference center located in western Massachusetts. As the elementary aged retreat attenders eventually outgrew our program it became clear that the spiritual community of transitioning children needed to be sustained in what soon became the Junior High retreat program, for youngsters in grades six through nine. I coordinated both programs for four years, eventually turning the Junior High Retreat program over to other emerging leaders so that I could focus more closely on the younger retreat program.Today, both programs function simultaneously with their own coordinators, staff, and bare-bones budgets.The sixth grade year serves as a bridge, with some children staying with the elementary aged retreat community, and some heading off to the Junior High program.The choice of which retreat to attend is made by the 6th grader (with parental/caregiver assistance, of course). After Junior High Yearly Meeting Retreats, young Quakers then head off to be in the NEYM Young Friends program, which is headed by Christel Jorgenson,Youth and Education Secretary for NEYM. Coordinators of the Elementary and Junior High Retreat programs receive a stipend for each retreat led, while the high school program, which offers a dozen or more retreats and other programs throughout the year, is coordinated by a fulltime staff person. All youth programs, from retreats to annual sessions, receive oversight and support from the Youth Programs Committee of NEYM. Each of these retreat programs, considered both individually and as a whole, provide wonderful opportunities for children, preadolescents and teens to be in a safe, loving and spiritual community among their peers through virtually all of their school-aged years. (Friends can learn more about our JYM Elementary Retreat program by visiting our website at www.jymretreats.org) For certain, the presence and grace of the Holy Spirit makes the way open. Here’s what we do to help the process along: 1. Who’s Coming? It’s important to determine what population a particular retreat is for and stick with the age and grade guidelines you create. In New England Yearly Meeting,we’ve found the grade divisions we have in place to work very well in terms of theme delivery, psychosocial and emotional development. 2. Staff Development: This piece is crucial and requires careful preplanning, oversight and guidance. In NEYM,we use a formal retreat staff application and reference form process.Adults who express an interest in staffing with us must first submit an application. Provided the applicant is suitable, they next must supply three written references on forms we supply before coming on board as staff. In our elementary retreat program we maintain a six-to-one child to staff ratio. Older retreat programs generally can run with wider ratios. Having plenty of staffers on hand though is enormously important. More staff allows for increased personal care of children, reduces staff fatigue, and helps the retreat to run more smoothly. Most of our staff pool consists of adult parents.We are additionally blessed by a handful of adults who are not parents, but who otherwise have demonstrated and known gifts of working with children. In our program,we’re fortunate to be able to say that most of our staffers are with us for several and sometimes all of the retreats we run in any given year. It’s also important to keep looking for ways to develop and attract new staff people so that ongoing resource leaders don’t burn out. Over time, ongoing staffers develop a sense of their own community and stay in touch with one another through trainings, emails, cards, calls, etc. Again, the net effect of this inner circle of staffers helps to sustain and strengthen the spiritual community that exists during and between retreats. We employ the use of “staff notebooks” that are used from retreat to retreat. Notebooks are tailored for the various staff positions and are filled with humorous notes, jokes, prayers, list of attenders, thematic support materials for small groups, schedules and related youth worker guidelines. Staff positions are specifically identified with additional support materials for retreat chef, retreat “nurse,” (not usually an R.N.), staff coordinator, music ministry, arts and crafts and outside games. Over the years we’ve found that adults who volunteer their time to serve on staff function better if they know what is expected of them and have the resources available that they will need. 3. Retreat Location: Location is everything! We’ve held retreats in medium sized and larger meetinghouses and at retreat centers. Look for locations that have adequate breakout spaces for both large and small group activities.Think rain, or foul weather, and how a potential location would work under these circumstances! Structures, whether sizable meetinghouses or conference centers have a certain “feel” to them. Some locations just seem to consistently work out better, and this may not necessarily be due to such factors as size and amenities. How’s the kitchen? Is there an adequate stove available with working oven and counter space for preparing large amounts of food? Are smoke detectors installed and working? When considering outside spaces, be aware of available unobstructed space for play and running.Where’s the traffic, and does it pose a hazard to young people? Also, it’s important to be mindful of the physical location of the retreat. Rural settings require an awareness of natural hazards such as poison ivy, barbed wire, cliffs, etc. Urban retreat locations necessitate attention to security issues, preventing intrusion and the like. Because our program ministers to younger children, our policy calls for staffers to be stationed outside whenever children are out of doors. 4. Theme and Program Development: Establishing a theme for each retreat creates an opportunity to learn and explore new topics. Our themes are selected a year in advance and reflect or touch upon in some way our yearly meeting’s book of Faith and Practice, Scripture and other spiritual teachings. Over the years we’ve found that certain themes attract and encourage participation and leadership of staffers who are gifted in areas related to an upcoming theme.Themes run the gamut from peace and social justice issues, our relationship with the Spirit, environmental subjects, to playful and whimsical topics as well.Variety and balance here are key. 5. Getting the Word Out: All of the materials we use are available online or as hard copy. Ninety five percent of all of our advance fliers, first timer information, health and safety forms and retreat sign-ups are done through our website. Each year our utilization of the Internet saves enormous amounts of paper, time and money that would otherwise be spent on printing and postage. Fliers for each retreat (whether online or printed) introduce the theme to be explored, the retreat location (with directions!), staff who will be present and applicable contact numbers, etc. Children who are coming to their first retreat receive a special welcoming note the week before. Parents also receive extensive “First-Timer Info” that answers many of their questions. Posting fliers annually in monthly meetings and getting listed in our yearly meeting’s quarterly newsletter also help to spread the word. Once a program has been up and running for awhile, the very best promotion comes informally, child to child, parent to parent. Maintenance of health and safety forms, which must be completed and be on file prior to a child’s first retreat and updated before each subsequent retreat, is especially important. The forms contain info on possible allergies (including foods, bugs, plants, meds, etc.) what medications are being taken, emergency contact numbers, health insurance info and emergency sign-offs. 6. Retreat Schedules and Timelines: Some years ago one of the children on retreat, with wristwatch firmly in place, checked our posted schedule and announced in all seriousness,“I’ve checked the schedule, and it looks like we’re running 45 minutes late!” It’s also not uncommon for younger children to ask, usually sometime late Saturday afternoon,“what day is it?” The point is maintaining a schedule and keeping it posted helps to keep both children and staffers orientated with what’s supposed to be happening at any given time.We post everything, from approximate wakeup and mealtimes, cleanup, discussion groups, outside games, free times, to when quiet hour will be happening. A typical retreat weekend begins with sign-in on Friday starting at 5:30 PM and concludes by 1:00 PM on Sunday. Friday evening mainly involves getting children settled in, fed, sharing whole community introductions, announcements, games, freetime, enjoying dessert and bedtime followed by staff meeting. On Saturday morning following breakfast and cleanup,we begin small groups, play games, have free-time and do arts and crafts, etc. On Saturday afternoon we finish our final two small groups, have time for outside games and/or free-time, followed by “quiet hour” for all from about 3:00–4:00 PM. (Quiet hour gives the whole community “permission” to crash for naps, reading or writing, so long as quiet is maintained for one solid, blessed hour!) On Saturday evening,we usually have some kind of planned music program or talent show. Sunday morning following breakfast and cleanup,we discuss upcoming retreats, thank our staff, do “lost and found,” and prepare to join the host meeting for meeting for worship. (And yes, all our children remain in meeting for worship for the hour!) Following lunch and cleanup, children leave with their parents by 1:00 PM, and staff pack up and leave by 2:30 PM or so. 7. Group Dynamics, etc.: Everyone, including staff,wears nametags throughout the weekend for obvious reasons. Wearing nametags also allows us to celebrate birthdays (with stickers!) and identify who’s in what small group using colored dots. Most importantly, when people arrive after traveling long distances to get to an unfamiliar location, it’s human nature to appreciate seeing your name on a nametag ready to be clipped on! Avoid using pins when selecting nametags for children.We no longer use the “shoelace” strings either, which can become “rope-burn” and choking hazards for running, tree climbing children. Gimp works well, as do colorful and cheap plastic snaps like the ones used on inexpensive key chains.These considerations are less signifigant for junior and high schoolers. These young Quakers typically resist nametags altogether! When they’re asked to use them, look for them dragging near the floor or buried under two pounds of fabric! Retreat themes are explored in small groups that meet three or four times during the weekend.We’ve found it much easier to establish small group composition before the retreat begins, being careful to balance gender and ages. Siblings usually like being in different groups and separating known cliques is always advisable! Small group clusters provide for a change in group dynamics that children really enjoy.Youngsters stay in their same small group and rotate to new topics and new staff leaders throughout the course of the weekend.We also try to vary mediums and activity levels from one small group to the next, using recorded music, clay, painting, movement, etc. 8. What’s For Supper? In our program,we call our beloved chef,Wendyl Ross, (also a professional chef in real life) the Supreme Kitchen Goddess! Why? Because when nutritious and tasty food is created and presented with love, everything else about the retreat weekend just seems to go more smoothly! And while it’s important to be able to meet everyone’s dietary needs, including meatless and vegan, spaghetti and garlic bread, salads, sandwiches and PBJ never disappoint, either. Be sure to offer lots of liquids, fruits and light snacks between meals as well. 9. Expenses and Fees: So that we can provide enjoyable meals, purchase necessary supplies and cover stipends and administrative overhead expenses,we charge $45.00 per child for the weekend. Sibling discounts are offered as well. Because we also stress that money should never keep anyone away we also offer partial or full scholarships for anyone who asks. In addition, it’s not uncommon for meetings to also provide financial assistance for their member children to attend retreats.The elementary and junior high retreat programs in our yearly meeting do not receive an annual budget. Our expenses are expected to be covered by retreat receipts, though yearly meeting and other donations cover shortfalls now and then. 10. Final Blessings: One of the most rewarding joys that we experience as staff is to see and feel the glow of happy and fulfilled children being reunited with their parents after lunch on Sunday.When it’s hard for them to leave, when children say,“this retreat should last longer!” and when parents struggle to get them out the door and into the car, then we know that it’s been a good retreat! We also pay close attention to the written evaluations that all children complete prior to leaving. Even days and weeks following a retreat,we frequently hear encouraging feedback from parents and young people alike. It is then we realize, with a sense of certainty and prayerful appreciation, that spiritual community did in fact blossom once again. And that, a blessing really, provides the way to begin planning our next retreat. For more information, visit us on the web at www.jymretreats.org. We are happy to share any of our forms and related materials with Friends wishing to learn more about retreat ministry. May God bless and cherish our children. Kevin Lee is a recorded minister and member of Westport (MA) Friends Meeting, NEYM, and is the Coordinator of NEYM’s Junior Yearly Meeting Elementary Retreat Program.You may reach him at Kevin@jymretreats.org The Quake that Rocked the Midwest I would like to report on a recent retreat/conference for high school age Friends called the “Quake that Rocked the Midwest.” The idea for this event came from my travels to other monthly meetings and yearly meetings and from conversations with Friends about youth programs in their areas. Another reason is because of the small number of high schoolers at my yearly meeting. When my sister was in high school, our yearly meeting (Illinois Yearly Meeting) and my monthly meeting had a big active high school group.However, when I started high school I was the only high schooler attending my meeting and there were only six teens at yearly meeting.Thankfully, our numbers have increased every year since then. Last year,we had twenty teens at yearly meeting. Of our previous two retreats, which we call “quakes,” one was canceled because only two teens signed up and only six teens attended the other one. In the first half of 2002, I went to two Lake Erie Yearly Meeting (LEYM) teen retreats, and saw that LEYM had more teens than Illinois YM but still was smaller than other yearly meetings I have visited or heard about from other young Friends. In the summer, I approached Kri Anderson, a friend and LEYM teen coordinator, about having a dual yearly meeting quake in the Chicago area to encourage more participation from Illinois YM teens and she thought the idea was great. Both yearly meetings greeted the idea with enthusiasm.A date was set for the 2003 Martin Luther King, Jr., holiday weekend. The idea grew in September, when Kri and I were at the FGC Nurturing the Meeting Community Conference in Wisconsin. Dorothy Day, Ohio Valley Yearly Meeting (OVYM) teen coordinator, also attended the conference. During my time talking to Dorothy and Kri, I suggested that we invite OVYM and Northern Yearly Meeting (NYM), which borders Illinois YM, to the Quake to make it a bigger event. I felt that Midwestern teens should be able to have a large retreat, like Philadelphia Yearly Meeting has, once a year. I have always envied East Coast Quaker teens for their large concentration in one geographic area. Kri and I started to plan the Quake.We modeled our schedule after an FGC Young Quakes schedule since we anticipated our Quake would be about the same size as a Young Quakes conference. Kri coordinated the mailing and registration process, and arranged for the presenters. The weekend was a great success! Twenty-eight teens and ten adults from all four yearly meetings came to the Evanston, Illinois, meetinghouse for the Quake, which was held from January 17–20, 2003. Paul Buckley from Richmond, Indiana, presented a workshop on the Bible and science fiction and Don Smith from Ann Arbor, Michigan led Bible study and presented a workshop on science and faith.The group split up and spent one afternoon at the zoo or shopping in Chicago. During the weekend, a lot of card playing and charades took place.The talent show was a fun time for the whole Quake.At the end of the weekend,we asked the large group if we should consider doing this again, and the response was overwhelmingly “YES!!!!” Greg Woods is a member of Columbia (MO) MM, Illinois Yearly Meeting. He was on the 2002 FGC High School Planning Committee and currently serves on the Young Quakes conference planning committee, a subcommittee of the FGC Religious Education Committee. Navigating the Multigenerational Retreat “Touch someone wearing blue!” “Now touch someone who has healed you or helped you when you were hurt!” “Touch someone who has given you shelter, someone who has kept you safe!” After singing “When I Needed a Neighbor,Were You There?” (Worship in Song, #293, Quaker Press of FGC), participants in a workshop played out these and other verses of the song in a game of “Touch Blue” together.The exercise pointed out how wide or narrow was the band of people who touched each other within the community. The activities went on to emphasize how building a peaceful community and world starts with reaching out to our neighbors and by having a biblical definition of who our neighbors are.And this workshop worked for all of the participants who ranged in age from 5 to mid 70’s. A retreat that is designed to bring children and adults together for specific and key portions enriches and deepens the community in a way that parallel programs, or programs with no room for children, can’t. Children’s frank, simple, concrete and magical ways of seeing the world can expand an adult’s understanding of a question. An adult who listens as earnestly to a child’s answer as to a peer’s validates the child’s position in the community. Learning,worshipping and having fun together all bring the community into deeper relationship which is all the richer for including everyone. Planning a multigenerational retreat is a balancing act. Children and adults need time with their peers to be balanced with the amount of time they spend together.The activities that include all generations need to strike a balance between seriousness and levity, and should be fun, engaging and meaningful.The activity content needs to be presented in a way that can be understood on multiple levels.This way the youngest children who think in concrete terms and the older abstract-thinking participants can all dive into it. I’ve found an approach to planning this sort of retreat that works well for me and another that has not. To plan an unsuccessful multigenerational retreat, the adult program should be planned first and then the children’s program and the multigenerational pieces should be conceived to fit in with it.There are two main reasons why this seems to be a formula for problems. One reason is that the multigenerational piece feels like an imposition on the adults’ program that is already set.Too much is compromised and the activities end up satisfying neither the adults nor the children. Another reason is that such a program can lead children to feel they are less important or marginalized. Fortunately,multigenerational programs planned in this way do not always have this negative effect on children; groups have had wonderful parallel children’s programs. However, sometimes the children’s programs and multigenerational components are added as an afterthought and feel more like babysitting. I have led children’s parallel retreats where the parents continually refer to the children’s program as babysitting. One result of this lack of intentionality may be that there are few children who are interested in attending and therefore few parents who attend. My most successful experiences with planning multigenerational retreats have been when the facilitator for the adult program and the facilitator for the children’s program work closely and prayerfully together from the beginning. After the theme is set and each facilitator has had time to think about how to explore the theme, they start sharing and talking and planning together. In this way, the theme can be addressed at different levels and in different ways for children and adults in their separate sessions. However, they can also come together at the beginning, the middle and the end in a way that recaps and builds on the work that each have already been doing. The community building that results is wonderful. Not only do the generations get to listen to the ideas, beliefs and views of each other, they can clearly see how the same theme is so important in all of their lives.While one facilitator may have primary responsibility for the multigenerational pieces, they consult together to make sure those pieces address the needs of both groups.Adults need content that will either push their thinking in a new direction or help them put together ideas in a new way. Children need action and something other than words to be part of the activity. It is certainly not always appropriate to have children present at retreats. But there are many times when it is appropriate and other times when it is necessary in order for adults to be able to attend. In these cases, careful attention to planning a multigenerational component to the retreat can make it a more powerful experience for everyone. Suggestions For Successful Multigenerational Retreats • Start and end as a community.The opening and closing sessions should be inclusive. If they are separate, the message is sent that there are two different programs going on here in the same space.Additionally, if the retreat lasts for more than one day, simply starting and ending with singing together each day reinforces the community aspect. • The theme and the work should be similar for children and adults. This way sessions that are together flow naturally for everyone and don’t end up being perceived as a break for the adults to play with the children or for the children to get down to work. • The activities need to be meaningful for all ages. Use discussion questions that can be answered on multiple levels, for example, “who is someone who has healed you or helped you when you were hurt?” Find an active way to ask the questions. For example, using the game Touch Blue, or turning everyone into detectives who have to find out information from various people. • Keep the multigenerational parts short.Time the activities well, keeping in mind the different attention spans of all the participants. The types of activities which actively engage young children for long periods of time could be tedious for adults, and vice versa. • A culminating session should be done together.This isn’t necessarily the closing activity of the retreat, but something that underlies the main theme of the work you have been doing together. • A key ingredient: Adults must be willing to play and children must be willing to work! This willingness is rooted in the culture of the group and some groups may simply have a harder time adapting to multigenerational work than others.The tone the facilitator sets from the beginning can help to loosen up stiff adults and motivate the children. • Trust in the Spirit: Facilitators are encouraged to have faith, giving a retreat their best discernment, planning and facilitation, and leaving the rest open to God’s movement. Christie Duncan-Tessmer is a member of Chestnut Hill MM, Philadelphia YM, where she serves as First Day School coordinator. She is the Junior Gathering Coordinator for Friends General Conference. |
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| Religious
Education Newsletter Susanne Siverling and Michael
Gibson, co-editors |
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To
the Religious Education webpage
This
issue focuses on retreats. Friends use the word “retreat”
for a range of diverse experiences from highly active communal events,
which are rather like small conferences, to contemplative periods of solitude.
Most involve a change of pace, a calling apart for spiritual nurture and
refreshment.The articles in this issue are written by Friends with considerable
experience in a variety of retreat settings for children and adults. Included
are how-to articles on planning intergenerational retreats and retreats
for elementary school age children, a report on a Young Friends retreat,
and an article on adult retreats. Look for practical resources on retreats
for high school age Friends in the next issue. In case you have not noticed,
the FGC Religious Education Newsletters are archived on the Religious
Education page of the FGC website (www.fgcquaker.org). As always,we welcome
your feedback and invite you to send us questions or topics you would
like addressed in the future.